On A Mission
by Tyrne J
Summary: Not a new idea, but oh, well... The scientists blackmail the pilots into forming a BOY BAND! ::gasp:: Will anyone survive? Only one part is up now, but, r+r, pls!
1. "Duo's Idea"

Disclaimer:GundamWing is the property of those wonderful people in Japan who came up with the premise of fighting mecha and cute bishounen pilots, and the great anti-war background behind it. This is a work of fanfiction, for entertainment purposes only and not for profit.Please don't sue me.

t_j:Yes, this is an old idea, but... ah, well... 

The G-Boy Band: by Tyrne_J

"Duo, your mission is to form a boy band with the other Gundam pilots."

Okay, what was I supposed to do?When G pulls a gun on you, steadying it inches from your face and tells you to convince the other Gundam pilots to form a boy band, what would _you_ do?

Exactly.

"_Are you crazy?!_"A little tap, and the gun went flying across the floor; G was too shocked to even react.I watched the gun spin to a stop beside a control console, then made a face at the old man."We're in the middle of a war here, and you want us to sing to crazed teenage girls!Just what good will - "

"If you don't do this, Deathscythe gets a paint job in pink and white, and we'll distribute - "A quick flick of the wrist, and I was staring at a photo. " - this." 

" - it'll be a good distraction for the OZ pilots.They'll never know what hit them.I'll get right on it."

"I knew you would figure out the purpose of this quickly.Now get it done."

Damn the blackmailing little - 

" - so wouldn't it be great if we all got together and formed a band?"

Quatre didn't look convinced."Duo, what you're saying is that we could distribute a message of peace and freedom to the colonies and Earth through music."

"Yeah!That's it!"Not really what I said, but trust Quatre to take things the right way.I nodded vigorously, hoping he'd agree.

"... G threatened to vandalize Deathscythe, didn't he?"

"Just say you'll do this."

He muttered something about sisters, then nodded, slowly.

"Surrre."Wufei was skeptical, and he glanced back and forth between me and Quatre."Just what makes you think that'll I'll join you in a band?"

"For peace and justice - " "For the love of Nataku - "Quatre and I started, then looked at each other.Wufei glared at me.

"And what makes you think that you know Nataku?!"

"Eh..."

The phone ringed, and we waited while he took the call.

"Hello?Yes... yes, I just was... yes... uh... uh - er... yes!Okay! Okay!"_Slam._

"Stubborn old - Fine.I'll join you in your boy band, Maxwell."

"H-Hey, wait a minute!this isn't my - "

"You asked, it's your idea."

"But it isn't my idea!"

Trowa sighed."You were blackmailed into doing this, too, weren't you?"

_Pink Deathscythe~_"I wanted to retain some sort of dignity with this job."

"There goes all hope of doing that."03's pilot carefully folded up his circus clothes and placed them in a trunk.A nod to Catherine, who was probably wondering what the three of us had to do with Trowa.Good thing she didn't ask.

"Why?"Heero, was being monosyllabic as usual.And no one else seemed to want to help me convince him.

"It's not my idea!"The others shrugged.

"But you're the one who's supposed to be talking.Orders."Wufei looked smug.Why do I always get nailed for stuff like this?

"Why?"Heero asked again.He carefully cleaned off his gun, waited for my answer.And what other reason was there?

"More publicity, less chance for Relena to go after you herself."

"I'm in."

"What, no 'mission accepted'?"

_Click._"No more than necessary."

He had a point.This boy band thing was humiliating enough for one day - who needed him to say something cliché to top it off?

And why does everyone want to shoot me?

To be continued...


	2. Wufei's Rant

t_j: Not that you were actually *waiting* for this to be continued... ^_^*   
  
On a Mission:   
G-Boys Band: Wufei   
  
He threatened Nataku. HE THREATENED NATAKU! How dare that -   
  
"Wufei, you're supposed to be teaching us how to dance." Maxwell was smirking ever so slightly. First O threatens to deface Nataku, then I have to  
deal with this? I glared.   
  
Why hadn't I kept my mouth shut? If I hadn't said anything about the dancing, we would have still been at a stalemate, sitting around drinking tea  
and thinking about doing something worthwhile instead of this ludicrous "mission." And as much as I wanted to blame this on that noisy American, it  
seemed that I wasn't the only one blackmailed into forming a boy band.   
~   
"So what exactly is it we're supposed to do? Dance, sing... what?"  
  
"I don't know, but we have a week to get this act together."  
  
"What do boy bands do?"  
  
"..."   
  
"..."  
  
"Idiots, they sing to screaming masses of girls and dance in unison to a generic pop beat."  
  
"Hey, Wufei, you know so much about this - and O did say that you knew how to dance - "   
  
"I didn't say anything."  
  
"Too late. Looks like you're stuck with this."  
~   
This was idiotic. We stood in the middle of the dance room, listening to Howard's old CDs and watching the old man try to show us how to - move  
together? He was clapping his hands and nodding up and down, then wandering away as he danced to a beat entirely different from the one that was  
coming from the speakers.   
  
I grit my teeth. "This is stupid. I say we just scrap this mission and go home."  
  
Click. Behind me, Heero readied his gun, and I could feel it leveling to point at me.   
  
"We must complete the mission."  
  
And Duo thought that was his way of showing endearment? For the love of Nataku! Duo has the brains of an ox!   
  
But I guess it was better not to say something like that; Nataku has warned me numerous times that Shinigami's fairly protective of the baka, and  
Nataku wouldn't help me if I get stomped on by an angry Gundam.   
  
"So we step like this - "  
  
"That's great!" Howard was enjoying this too much. He was nodding appreciatively at Trowa's moves. "Y'know, you look almost like S did whenever  
we were a band."   
  
NANI?!   
  
We paused, gaped at Howard, who was nodding away, eyes closed, foot tapping.   
  
"You. Did. What?!"  
  
One eye opened. "We were a group. But you're too young to remember, I bet."  
  
Quatre was a slight green as he peered over the now-stopped CD player, looking in through the clear cover. "This... is you?"  
  
Did I mention that it was awful music?   
  
"Mecha Masters?!"  
  
Nataku help us; I need an aspirin.   
  
"Of course, you'll need a new wardrobe, too. You guys need to look trendy."  
  
Make that a whole bottle of aspirin.   



	3. Heero's Report

WARNING: Bad fashion sense ahead. Don't continue if your mind's eye can't take the abuse.  
  
::By Tyrne J::  
On a Mission:   
G-Boys band: Heero   
  
I like my gun. It comes in very handy in stressful situations.  
  
Duo says I must get stressed out a lot. But then again, I had to room with him for about a month.   
  
Of course, no one needs to know that the gun's empty half the time, although I've found that I can load it fairly  
quickly should the need arise.   
  
"You're getting stressed again, Heero." Duo cast me a worried look. Actually, he was looking at the gun. How  
thoughtful of him.  
  
"We look stupid."  
  
Duo sweatdropped. "Eheheh... Well, I didn't pick out the clothes..."  
  
"Here you go, Duo." Quatre was picking out a tune on the piano, with Trowa looking over his shoulder.   
  
"What's your range, Wufei?"  
  
"... What?"  
  
"He said he could dance; he didn't say anything about singing."  
  
"I look like a weak pansy." Wufei picked at his feathered shirt with distaste. "Who bought these, Quatre?"  
  
"What about you, Heero? Have you sung before?" The blonde was ignoring us.  
  
"... Quatre?"  
  
"Who bought these clothes?" Howard had only handed out the garments, looking only at the tags with our names on them.  
  
Quatre was studying the piece of paper on the piano. "Well, um... " Then, he and Trowa shared glances and looked away. "Well..."  
  
Stressful situation. /Click./ "Are you responsible for this?"  
  
"IIE! Nonono! It wasn't us!" Quatre looked pale - or maybe it was the black skintight tank top he was wearing. "It  
was - "  
  
"Catherine and Quatre's sisters got word from Howard, and they went on a shopping spree." Trowa's expression hadn't  
changed, but his eyes showed that he was in pain.   
  
"That's RIIIGHT!" Catherine crowed, eyes sparkling. She had us lined up on a makeshift stage that afternoon. "Just  
look at these beautiful bishounen! Don't they look /kawaii/?!"  
  
We're Gundam pilots. We /are not/ "beautiful bishounen". GUNDAM PILOTS-   
  
"First off, here's Chang Wufei - "  
  
Wufei was growling something about "obnoxious onnas" -   
  
" - and he looks just /hip/ with the black feathered shirt and leopard-stripe flare pants. Pose for us, Wufei!"  
  
Did he know that crossing his arms and frowning only made the other girls sigh even more? Doubtful.  
  
"And here's Quatre Raberba Winner - "  
  
"Ehehe, hello, everyone!" He smiles a lot, too. Note to self: next time we're on a mission together, Quatre's  
rooming with Duo.  
  
" - And doesn't /he/ look /snazzy/ with his black midriff tank and jeans? Niice. And this sheer silver shirt completes  
the outfit; Quatre's so /sexy!/"  
  
He was blushing profusely now, and the girls giggled and sighed even more.  
  
"Sweet, Quatre-baby!" Catherine had a dangerous sparkle in her eye; I've seen it in J's eyes too much to not notice  
it.  
  
She couldn't have been a part of this...  
  
Could she?  
  
"Next up, Trowa Barton!"   
  
For once, I thought I heard an audible groan from O3's pilot.   
  
"So /suave/, this young man is sporting a dashing green leather vest and long-sleeve orange turtleneck! And check out  
the shorts, girls!"  
  
The girls /ooh/-ed in unison. Never mind that Trowa was the tallest, Catherine had seen it fit to give him shorts.   
  
Trowa was definitely not liking this.   
  
"Down the line, here's Duo Maxwell! And we've done something special with him!"  
  
He was muttering under his breath, but even muttering, he was still loud enough.  
  
"Special? I agree with that. Hideous? That too. Man, whenever I get my hands on G, he's..."  
  
/Does he ever shut up?!/  
  
"Pose for us, Du-hon!" Catherine blew a kiss at him, and he immediately beamed at her, striking a pose.  
  
"How's this, /Cathy/?" That smile looked familiar -  
  
"Perfect, Du-hon!" The girl beamed back, then faced the crowd. "We decided to do something with his hair - "  
  
"OOOH! DREADLOCKS!" The crowd was shrieking.\Stressful situation - \  
  
" - And I see you've noticed. Du-hon, give us a twirl!"   
  
He beamed even more, and spun around on one heel. Several tiny braids slapped at me and Trowa as Duo turned to face  
the crowd again, still beaming.  
  
I definitely knew that look.  
  
"And we've completed his outfit with this /very sexy/ violet tank top and frayed jean shorts - isn't he great,  
girls?"  
  
"/YAYYY!!!/"  
  
That look was the "All-my-enemies-will-fear-Shinigami-and-you're-my-enemy" look. He smiles like that whenever he  
pilots Deathscythe - Shinigami, as he calls it, sometimes - in battle.   
  
He smiles like that at Relena. And that's why I tolerate him.  
  
"And now, last, but not least, of the /beautiful bishounen/, Heero Yuy!"  
  
I repeat: We are /Gundam pilots/, NOT "beautiful bishounen" -   
  
"Step forward, Hee-chan!"  
  
And my name is NOT "Hee-chan" -   
  
"Hee-chan?" I could hear Duo snickering beside me. If only Catherine hadn't confiscated my gun... Why was I here  
again? Forget Relena - she would follow me anywhere -   
  
Oh, yeah. That picture.   
  
"Isn't he /hot/? A pink mesh shirt and shiny silver pants are just /perfect/ for Hee-chan, don't you think? And check  
out the shoes! Platforms!"  
  
"/KAWAII!/"  
  
Stressfulsituationstressfulsituationmustfinishthemissionmustfinish-  
  
"And as you all know, we're already in the process of finding more outfits for the boys!"  
  
I want my gun.  
  
To Be Continued...  
  
  
  
t_j: ^_^* Ah, well, I had a decidedly rough time writing this ::rolls eyes at impromptu fashion sense:: Sorry it  
took so long for these two installments to come out, by the way ^_^* In any case, please r+r, and thanks!  
  



End file.
